When a person has a broken heart, it is important that they take care of themselves. Simply remembering to eat and drink enough throughout the day and talking to others when possible are important steps in taking care of oneself.

Sometimes, however, a broken heart is not healable with self-care. In these instances, a person may wish to speak with a mental health professional.

This article discusses self-care for a broken heart and when to contact a professional for help.

A broken heart occurs when a person experiences loss. Most often, people use this phrase to describe how someone feels after the breakdown of a romantic relationship.

However, this is not the only cause of a broken heart. A person may also experience similar feelings after:

the death of a family member
a friendship ending
the loss of a job or opportunity
child loss or infertility
the loss of a pet
any other loss that affects a person’s emotional well-being

Experiencing these events is very stressful, particularly if the loss happens unexpectedly.

The American Psychological Association detail some negative physical and emotional effects of stress. Specifically, they say that this stress may result in:

nausea
stomach pain
increased blood pressure
headaches
asthma attacks
depression

Learn more about the stages of grief here.

Self-care tips

Following a breakup or the loss of a loved one, a person should prioritize self-care. Self-care could involve making lifestyle, dietary, or mental adjustments.

Specifically, to manage anxiety and depression, a person can take the following steps:

staying hydrated
getting at least 8 hours of sleep but not sleeping too much
eating a balanced diet that is rich in nutrients
avoiding alcohol and caffeine
increasing their amount of physical activity each day, if possible
promoting relaxation using breathing techniques
reducing and avoiding stress, if possible

Because a person may experience intense stress with a broken heart, it is important that they surround themselves with people they love and take part in activities they enjoy.

The American Heart Association (AHA) suggest that people may feel better after:

engaging in enjoyable activities for as little as 10–15 minutes at a time
taking time out of the day for meditation or yoga
playing with children or a pet
exercising or engaging in physical activity, from gardening to running

Also, the Anxiety and Depression Association of America recommend trying one or more of the following to help manage anxiety and stress:

volunteering or getting involved in charitable work
accepting that a person cannot control everything
counting to 10 when feeling overwhelmed
exercising, eating well, and getting enough sleep
doing or watching something that makes the person laugh
taking time out of the day to do enjoyable things

How can the loss of a relationship affect mental health?

Experiencing the loss of a relationship due to a breakup or death is traumatic. People will likely feel strong emotions immediately following this trauma.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, these reactions are intense and can last for several weeks or months.

It is normal for a person with trauma to experience symptoms such as:

continually thinking about what happened
feelings of anxiety, anger, or sadness
difficulty sleeping

The intensity of what a person feels will typically lessen over time. However, in some instances, these feelings may grow in intensity and make a person feel worse.

When this happens, it is important that they speak with a doctor or other mental health professional. Without this help, these emotions can develop into depression, generalized anxiety disorder, and other psychiatric conditions.

Depression

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, major life changes that cause trauma and stress can also trigger depression.

Symptoms of depression include:

persistent feelings of sadness or emptiness
hopelessness
irritability
a loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies
changes in appetite
fatigue
restlessness
difficulty concentrating or making decisions
sleep disturbances, such as difficulty sleeping, waking too early, or sleeping too much
suicidal thoughts or behaviors

Anxiety

The National Institute of Mental Health also cite stressful and negative life events as potential risk factors for anxiety disorders.

People with general anxiety disorder may experience:

irritability
tension
worry
restlessness
feeling on edge
fatigue
difficulty falling or staying asleep
difficulty concentrating

Other psychiatric conditions

One 2015 study suggests that if a person’s loved one dies suddenly or unexpectedly, they may have a greater chance of developing a psychiatric condition.

These include:

panic disorder
social phobia
alcohol dependency
post-traumatic stress disorder
dysthymia, a chronic form of major depression

Other complications from a broken heart

A broken heart may not only increase the chance of depression or anxiety. Emotional distress and grief may also cause other health conditions.

Some of these include:

Broken Heart Syndrome

A person may experience broken heart syndrome after experiencing a traumatic loss. This happens when a traumatic event causes the body to release a surge of adrenaline. The effects of this adrenaline surge may reverse within 1–2 weeks.

There are several potential triggers of broken heart syndrome, and these include both emotional and physical stressors.

Some triggers of broken heart syndrome include:

extreme anger
fear
grief
seizure
significant blood loss
stroke

The symptoms are similar to those of a heart attack, and a person may experience:

pain in the chest
difficulty breathing
dizziness

Complications of broken heart syndrome

In some cases, this surge of adrenaline can temporarily weaken the heart muscle and cause:

heart rhythm abnormalities
congestive heart failure
shock
low blood pressure

Withdrawal

In a 2016 study, researchers found that the effect of heartbreak can elicit a level of withdrawal similar to weaning off of an addictive drug.

The withdrawal symptoms a person may feel after a breakup include:

lethargy
hypersomnia
appetite loss
anxiety
insomnia
irritability
binge eating
chronic loneliness

Complicated grief

Complicated grief is a condition wherein a person constantly ruminates about the death of a loved one. They also go to great lengths to avoid events or things that remind them of that loss. It affects roughly 7% of bereaved individuals.

Complicated grief can lead to:

anxiety
significant sleep disturbances
difficulty with relationships or work activities
substance misuse or dependency
depression
suicidal thoughts

Stress

Stress can manifest in all sorts of ways, with people experiencing a range of different symptoms.

According to the American Psychological Association, stress can cause:

muscle tension
increases in cortisol and other hormones
potential damage to the cardiovascular system and a temporary increase in blood pressure
respiratory issues, such as asthma attacks

Seeking help

If a person feels overwhelmed with negative emotions, they may wish to consider talking with a healthcare professional. This can be a doctor or a mental health specialist.

A person should speak with their doctor or call 911 immediately if they experience any symptoms of a heart attack or are feeling suicidal.

If a person feels that their depression or grief is getting worse and they have no one to turn to, they can contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline.

Summary

Sudden and intense emotional pain from a broken heart can drastically change how a person feels. This can result in them experiencing extreme sadness and grief. These emotions may put them off eating or sleeping and take away their enjoyment of life.

Taking steps to take care of oneself can help a person ease that emotional pain until it passes.

To ease the pain of a broken heart, a person should try to surround themselves with people they love and try to keep up with the hobbies or activities that once brought them joy.

The pain should eventually pass, even if it sometimes feels as though it will not.

Suicide prevention

If you know someone at immediate risk of self-harm, suicide, or hurting another person:

Ask the tough question: “Are you considering suicide?”
Listen to the person without judgment.
Call 911 or the local emergency number, or text TALK to 741741 to communicate with a trained crisis counselor.
Stay with the person until professional help arrives.
Try to remove any weapons, medications, or other potentially harmful objects.

If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, a prevention hotline can help. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is available 24 hours per day at 800-273-8255. During a crisis, people who are hard of hearing can call 800-799-4889.